Since there was no hockey on Monday night, I figured it would be a good time to go through the closet in the VFMS office and get rid of some crap that has accumulated over the last season. Yes, I was cleaning—and yes, it happens to be spring. But it would be a little too cliché to call it “Spring Cleaning.” Instead, I choose to call it 2009-10 Cleansing. After all, I’ve been meaning to get rid of that Kings’ Alexander Frolov jersey for awhile now.
All in all, it was actually a really productive day. I’m a big fan of consuming information, so I have a ton of books and magazines. About half way through the season, I was able to get rid of my 2009-10 Playoff Preview with Ales Hemsky on the cover (thankfully, the guys at The Hockey Zen were drunk enough to take it off my hands—waste not, want not). But after I went through the rest, I was able to toss a few more that were outdated as well. I was able to throw away any draft notes that I had for the Toronto Maple Leafs. I was able to throw away a tourist book for my trip to BC called “Discovering Vancouver” by Stephane Auger. A few others that seemed utterly useless and outdated were “Guide to Winning a Shootout” that featured the New York Rangers, “Consistency” by Colin Campbell, “Clutch Goaltending” by Marc Andre Fleury, and a WebMD publication that had contributions from both the Boston Bruins and Detroit Red Wings. Like I said, I have a lot of books.
But it was more than just books that I got rid of. I decided to donate my brand new Jay Bouwmeester Calgary Flames jersey. It is only a year old, so I tried to sell it on eBay. Unfortunately, no one was interested because it was too expensive for what people were going to get.
Something else I thought I was going to be able to get rid of was all of the ownership problems in Phoenix. They were new last time I cleaned the closet out—but after a year I thought that I’d be able to discard them and move on. Apparently, the City of Glendale had other ideas. Unfortunately, it looks like I’ll be holding onto those problems for the offseason. If we’re lucky, we’ll be able to move on when the season starts. But hey, on the flip side… I was able to throw away Len Barrie and Oren Koules. The bag was heavy—I channeled my inner-Gary Bettman and asked Jeff Vinik to take out the trash.
Luckily, I was able to throw away Carey Price’s Habs pads. They were taking up a ton of room and I really don’t think he’s going to have any more need for them. Unfortunately, I did have to add something to the closet for him. For the time being, I throw a Canadiens baseball cap into the closet on his behalf. He might need that more than a helmet if he’s around next season.
You’d be surprised how many things pile up over the course of a season. I found the Sharks choker label that they discarded in the playoffs year. I had every intention of throwing it away, but I figured it would be best if I saved it for the Capitals.
I received not one, but two neck braces in the mail from Pennsylvania—one of them was from M. Cooke in Western Pennsylvania; the other was addressed from a “Captain Boom Goes the Dynamite” from “Philly Mother Fucker.” Either way, I think that both of these were sent to the wrong address and were meant for someone else.
For some reason, I found Yann Danis buried under a bunch of other crap that needed to get thrown out. And he was wearing a Devils jersey? (Did they ever actually let him play)? For some reason, he kept begging me not to get rid of him. He kept mumbling stuff about South Florida and how he’s “not just another Scott Clemmensen.” I’m not sure what that was all about—so I just turned up NHL Network while Kevin Weekes was talking to drown him out.
I was able to toss all of those groin strain exercise DVD’s for Marian Gaborik. Actually, on second thought, I should probably dig through the trash and keep those for one more season. I’m not 100% sure he won’t need those anymore.
I threw away the Panthers’ Tomas Vokoun jersey so I could make room for the Flyers’ Tomas Vokoun jersey that will be in style this summer. I let go of my online betting receipts that had the Predators winning the Cup at 50 to 1 (come on, those are damn good odds for a team with goaltending and defense, right?)
Another thing that I wanted to get rid of was the John Tavares Calder Trophy that was pre-engraved last June. Actually, I couldn’t bring myself to throw it away so I just moved it to the garage with the extra quilts and blankets. I mean, I’m sure it will be a collector’s item one day, right?
I have to admit—I absolutely hate cleaning. When you start going through stuff, it usually brings back so many memories of your past. I threw away the video of Alex Ovechkin pushing a fan out of the way at the Olympics. It’s funny, when I got that video, I assumed it was a member of the media that he was pushing—but then I realized he didn’t even acknowledge the media at the Olympics. But then again, the fan DID look Russian. Understandably, I was completely confused. All I came away with from that video was that he didn’t like English speaking media, nor Russian speaking fans.
But after I got rid of all that stuff, I felt cleansed. With all of that garbage out of my life, I feel like I can move on and start fresh. I’m pretty sure it will only take another season to fill up that closet with a bunch of new crap, but I can put that Taylor Hall Calder right next to the Tavares trophy!